Hibbob Remembrance Day; Royal Library Robbed
Five hundred years ago, on this day, Hibbob Jibberson was born in the Hermwash. As a young lad, orphaned and depressed, he stowed himself away on an immigration vessel and travelled to the lands then called the Hoglands to leave behind his old life and start it anew. He quickly became fascinated by rumors of Duffs and their vast domain across the sea. In Hibbob’s time, the Duff Herms still resisted the Ba Herms control and pillaged and burned their farms, instilling the fear in the colonizers that would eventually lead to the end of the colonization movement. By this time, however, the Duff Herms’ philosophy had changed and modern Hermistani society was beginning to form.
The question historians have looked at again and again is how this process came to pass; what possessed the Duff Herms to surrender their position and make friends with the Ba Herms? What sort of mysterious leader controlled the Duff Herms and kept them out of trouble across the continent while they were resisting in the first place? The first question remains unanswered, but thanks to Hibbob, the leading theory for the second is the existence of a highly intelligent widespread that was likely behind the resistance movement as stated in the first of the two books in his series, a A Brief History of Duff Herms, which is, to this day, the leading source on Duff Herm philosophy and their transition to Hermism, as he was the only literate scholar of Duff Herm society at the time.
When Hibbob arrived in the Hogland, he made it his priority to understand Duff Herms and their complex relation with their habitat and their strange cultural traditions such as Yibbing. After years of adventure described in detail in his extensive works, he uncovered much of Duff Herms’ inner thinkings which proved to be crucial in the conversion process from hunting and gathering to farming. For this accomplishment and the completeness of his works, he had been praised for centuries, but as became evident a few days ago, we have not yet read his works in completeness, as a mysterious third book from the series A Brief History of Duff Herms was found in a remote plantation the other day, buried under twelve feet of rock and dirt.
When a plantation owner from the Pillbert Plantation Company discovered a chest during a renovation, engraved with the markings of pre-Hermistani wood-carvers, he knew that something of value must be stored inside. Upon finding the book, titled The Duff Herms’ Greatest Legend, he turned it in to the authorities who brought it to the Royal Library where a Duff Herm speed reader was tasked with reading the book containing over 300 pages.
The Press waited eagerly outside for hours as the Duff Herm read, but when night began to set in and there was still no report from the Duff Herm, we entered the library and found a classified investigation underway. The Royal Library had been robbed, evidently a robber had taken advantage of the library’s vacant policy to ensure silence while the speed reader read and had broken in through a window. The library was still being searched, but, as of the time of writing this, only one book has been reported missing: The Duff Herms’ Greatest Legend by Hibbob Jibberson.
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